Living In the Wilderness

De 31:6 “Be strong and of a good courage, fear not, nor be afraid of them: for the LORD thy God, he it is that doth go with thee; he will not fail thee, nor forsake thee.”

While wandering through the wilderness, the people of Israel would never stop complaining. Every time they confronted some difficulty, they complained and threatened to rebel. Sometimes they wanted to go back to Egypt to become slaves again, and sometimes they reverted to pagan idolatry. Whenever they were short of food, water, or their enemies threatened to attack, they were sure to start complaining. Even though Moses and the Lord had already seem them through every difficulty. They were on the verge of entering the Promised Land when once again all their fears got the better of them. So after spending two years in the wilderness, they ended up spending another thirty eight, because they didn’t have the courage to enter in.

It just didn’t make any sense. You would have though they would have learned their lesson. You would have thought after seeing the red sea parted, they would no longer question God’s faithfulness or Moses’ leadership from that point forward. Unfortunately, it wasn’t a matter of miracles so much as character. It wasn’t that there were not enough miracles, but that miracles alone were not enough to change their character.

Jesus makes the same point while telling the story of Lazarus (Lu 16:19-31). Lazarus was the poor man who went to heaven, while the rich man who had ignored Lazurus’ plight ended up in hell. While in hell, the rich man asked Abraham to send Lazarus to his brethren as a sign to warn them, so they wouldn’t end up where he was. Abraham pointed out that if they won’t listen to the prophets God had already sent, they won’t believe in any miracles sent from heaven. The rich man was already evidence of that. The very fact that this rich man wanted Lazarus to give up his place in heaven in order to do his bidding again on earth, only demonstrated that his own heart and character hadn’t changed at all. In spite of ending up in hell, he hadn’t learned his lesson.

It didn’t matter how many miracles God performed for Israel as they wandered in the wilderness, or how many times He delivered them from trouble. The problem was their character, and the fact that they were still thinking and acting like slaves. They wanted someone to take care of them and force them to do everything – just like their Egyptian masters had done – rather than taking the initiative and trusting God. There’s no question they wanted to be a free people in their own land. Nevertheless, they were still behaving like slaves in Egypt.

Jesus makes a similar point about his own disciples. While he was praying in Gethsemane on the night before his crucifixion, even though he’d asked his disciples twice to watch and pray for him, they kept falling asleep. Finally, he told them, “The spirit is indeed willing, but the flesh is weak.” (Mt 26:41) And as if to prove him correct, they would all soon desert him when he was arrested. In the same way that Israel had followed Moses for two years in the wilderness, only to get cold feet when courage mattered most, and it was time to enter the promised land - the twelve disciples followed Jesus during the two years of his ministry, only to desert him just when he needed them most.

It wasn’t that their flesh was weak and needed to be strengthened and fortified – that wasn’t what Jesus was saying. It was that their flesh had made them weak, and unable to do what the spirit of God required. Their flesh was too overpowering, and still directing their lives. That’s why they kept falling asleep even though they intended to stay awake, and why they later ran away - even though, like Peter, they deeply regretted what they had done. Their spirit was willing and their hearts were in the right place even though - like the people of Israel - they lacked the courage to follow through, and ran away to save their own skin. In contrast with Jesus who prayed, “not my will, but thine.” Even though Jesus wanted to live on in the flesh, (for he had humbled himself as a man, and so had the same flesh and instinct for self-preservation as other men), he became committed to doing God’s will rather than what his flesh required, and ultimately sacrificed his life to save the world.

St.Paul makes the same point (Ga 5:17) “For the flesh lusteth against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh: and these are contrary the one to the other: so that ye cannot do the things that ye would.” It wasn’t that the disciples didn’t believe in Jesus, or hadn’t seen enough miracles. That wasn’t the issue. The problem was their flesh - all their fears and their instinct for self-preservation - was still too strong and too much in control of their lives. They were too enslaved to their flesh to be as courageous as they would have liked to have been – Peter especially. Though eventually they would go through trials and be persecuted for being Christians so they would have the courage to spread the Gospel.

The same was true for the people of Israel. They were born and raised as slaves and taught to fear and be dependent upon their masters. They were too enslaved to all their doubts and fears to take hold of the Promised Land as free men and women. Slavery is a condition where people must live in constant fear of their master’s power over them, whereas freedom is a condition where our fear and awe must be reserved for God alone. To the extent that we fear anything or anyone other than God, and give into that fear, we are still controlled by our flesh, and not yet completely free.

The process by which God builds character and frees us from enslavement to our fears and flesh is often a long and arduous process. It doesn’t mean we’re bad people and God is punishing us, or that we don’t have faith – it’s God's way of strengthening and enabling our faith. “every branch that beareth fruit, he purgeth it, that it may bring forth more fruit.” (Joh 15:2) Our spirit is willing, but the extent to which we are living in our flesh we are still weak. That's why God uses trials to teach us how to live in the Spirit.

Before Moses ever led his people into the wilderness, and before he ever saw the burning bush, God had already led and tested him for forty years in the very same wilderness, after Moses first gave into his fears and ran away from Egypt. The difference between Moses and the rest of Israel is that he’d already done his time in the wilderness, and now was helping them do theirs.

Before Jesus ever started his ministry, he also did his own time in the wilderness – forty days and forty nights without any food or water. Why would Jesus need to be tested in this manner, since he was without any sin and the only Son of God? Because Jesus was also still a man, and every man and woman must be tested and undergo certain hardships in life in order to build and strengthen their character. There is no other way. If there was, we would certainly all take it. But since there isn’t, we must all suffer certain trials in life, while maintaining our faith in God.

We can choose to blame God for allowing bad things to happen, and for leading us into the wilderness - but we cannot really blame Him for keeping us stuck there, since that’s to a large extent our choice: Whether we are resenting God and waiting for a miracle, or accepting what has happened and seeking the courage to overcome it. Whether or not we come out of the wilderness with more courage, or ever come out at all (those who were once slaves in Egypt never came out) depends upon our faith, and His ability to strengthen and build character. It’s not a matter of God performing miracles for us, but by confessing our faults and weaknesses, we ask Him to remove our defects of character. The real miracle is how God can turn the weakness of our flesh into the courage to live life more fully.